The manner by which an individual with dementia experiences the world is not always based in our current reality. Probably one of the most distressful yet powerful experiences you may encounter is something called time-shifting. This isn’t just not remembering what day it is; it is a full immersion in a different period of their life. For example, you might be sitting together at the dining table, and suddenly, your older loved one is convinced they’re a teenager waiting for their parents to come home. It is confusing for them and certainly will be equally baffling for you. But understanding how to navigate time-shifting can help make those moments more manageable—and even meaningful.
What Is Time-Shifting?
Time-shifting happens when someone with dementia feels as though they are living in an alternate time in their past. Beyond reminiscing, it’s a strong, convincing belief that they’re currently in that particular time frame. For them, the present moment fades, replaced by vivid memories that feel as real as today. They can call out for individuals who passed away years ago or speak about events that took place decades earlier like they were happening now.
Simple Tips to Help You Navigate Time-Shifting Moments
When time-shifting happens, it’s instinctive to want to correct the person’s perception, to gently remind them that they’re here, with you, in the present. However, we know that this approach often contributes to frustration, distress, and confusion. As an alternative, try becoming a part of their reality. Validate their emotions, acknowledge what they’re expressing, and respond with empathy. If they’re concerned about an appointment with their parents, for instance, you might say, “It sounds like you truly care about being on time. They must have meant so much to you.” This response can offer comfort minus the jarring reminder that their parents are not around anymore.
Making Connection Through Their World
Time-shifting is often an opportunity to create moments of connection with the individual you love. Ask questions about the period of time they are absorbed in, such as, “What’s your favorite thing to do when your parents get home?” Questions such as this can encourage storytelling that engages them while offering you a deeper perception of their past. You might hear stories you’ve never heard before or learn things that bring you closer.
Tending to Yourself
It is vital to recognize that time-shifting could be emotionally exhausting. Seeing a loved one drift into another time and place can leave you feeling lost. Be sure you have support, whether from professional resources, friends, or family. Joining a support group for caregivers can also provide you with useful tips and camaraderie from others who know very well what you’re going through. Remember, you do not have to do this alone.
Our Dementia Caregivers Can Help
Though we know how hard it may be, time-shifting moments offer a view into the life experiences that have shaped your loved one. And we’re here to assist you every step of the way in looking after a person you love with dementia. Our professional care specialists are fully trained and experienced in the unique nuances of dementia and are available to help in Nipomo, Arroyo Grande, Lompoc, and the nearby areas. Reach out to us at 805-737-4357 for a complimentary in-home meeting to find out more.