Anyone who has been a caregiver for an aging parent can fill you in on how overwhelming it can be. But looking after both parents at the same time, figuring out how to balance each person’s unique needs, schedules, and personalities? If you’re in this position, you may feel like you’re struggling to manage everything, and there are a few important factors to keep in mind to safeguard your health and ensure you’re there for both of them in the long run.
Identifying the Signs of Burnout When Caregiving for Two
Burnout can catch anyone off guard, but it often comes faster when you are balancing the needs of two people. Perhaps one parent requires help getting to frequent medical appointments, while the other needs daily assistance with meals and personal care. When feelings of exhaustion, irritability, or mental drain become constant, it might be a sign that caregiver burnout is setting in. It’s vital to acknowledge these signs early and take measures to alleviate stress to prevent yourself from reaching a breaking point.
Handling Conflict Between Elderly Parents
When taking care of both parents, there might be instances when they disagree with each other. Long standing disagreements, frustrations, and differences in opinions can resurface, and caregiving stress might inflate those tensions. During these instances, try to remain unbiased and offer a listening ear to both sides without taking on the role of referee. You might recommend they take a breather or take some time apart if the situation allows, to let each person calm down. Encouraging them to discuss their feelings freely, without judgment, will often defuse conflict. And if disagreements become a consistent challenge, consider involving a counselor or mediator who specializes in elder care conflicts. Outside support can help both parents feel heard while reducing the strain on you as the caregiver.
Setting Boundaries for Your Sanity and Wellbeing
Boundaries are essential when caring for two people with different needs. Although it might feel difficult to take a step back, establishing small boundaries will make a major difference in preserving your energy and patience. Start with planning regular breaks, even if it’s just a few hours every week by using respite care. Recognize that boundaries are not about distancing yourself; they’re about ensuring you are able to give them the best care possible without becoming overwhelmed.
Connecting With a Supportive Community
Taking care of aging parents can feel isolating, and sometimes it is hard to find someone who understands the additional challenges of caring for two people. Connecting with other caregivers in similar situations can provide encouragement and relief. Seek out caregiver support groups in your community or online where you can share experiences, seek advice, and feel less alone in your journey.
Embrace Self-Care
Being a caregiver for two people does not leave much time for yourself, but self-care is more vital than ever before in these circumstances. Even small moments, like a quiet coffee break or a walk outside, can recharge you and help prevent burnout. Remember, when you take time to look after yourself, you are better prepared to care for your loved ones.
Knowing When It Is Time to Take A Step Back
There may come a time when you understand that proceeding as the primary caregiver is no longer sustainable for you or beneficial for your loved ones. If being a caregiver is consistently affecting your relationships with others, physical health, or mental wellbeing, it could be time for you to consider stepping back. Shifting to professional support, such as in-home help, can offer a balanced solution. Remember, opting to step back does not mean you’re deserting your loved ones. It means you are recognizing their evolving needs and choosing the best path forward to ensure their safety and your well-being.
Finding Balance on a Complex Journey
Let Superior Senior Home Care help you help your loved ones. We provide customized home care solutions in Santa Maria, Arroyo Grande, Lompoc, as well as the surrounding areas that will fit the needs of your loved ones and provide you with the healthy balance you need. Call us any time at 805-737-4357 or reach out to us online for more information about our services.